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	<title>Comments on: Signs that someone is leaving your church</title>
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	<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/</link>
	<description>Life, adventure and faith in southwest Virginia</description>
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		<title>By: MILLIE</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-246178</link>
		<dc:creator>MILLIE</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 02 Apr 2010 01:11:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-246178</guid>
		<description>But if they spoke the reason for leaving they would be judged and dismissed. Leadership takes everything so personally that there&#039;s little room in most churches for comment that is not 100% supportive.

I find your article lacking in compassion.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>But if they spoke the reason for leaving they would be judged and dismissed. Leadership takes everything so personally that there&#8217;s little room in most churches for comment that is not 100% supportive.</p>
<p>I find your article lacking in compassion.</p>
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		<title>By: Jeff</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-109269</link>
		<dc:creator>Jeff</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Dec 2008 16:24:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-109269</guid>
		<description>That&#039;s a great question, Rolling. What were some of your reasons for leaving? Another good link is &lt;a href=&quot;http://www.journeyguy.com/when-its-time-to-leave-your-church/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;here&lt;/a&gt; and &lt;a href=&quot;http://www.journeyguy.com/how-long-do-you-plan-to-be-at-your-church/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;here.&lt;/a&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>That&#8217;s a great question, Rolling. What were some of your reasons for leaving? Another good link is <a href="http://www.journeyguy.com/when-its-time-to-leave-your-church/" rel="nofollow">here</a> and <a href="http://www.journeyguy.com/how-long-do-you-plan-to-be-at-your-church/" rel="nofollow">here.</a></p>
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		<title>By: Rolling</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-109192</link>
		<dc:creator>Rolling</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Dec 2008 01:28:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-109192</guid>
		<description>I just left my church of 5 years served immensely and I have never done this before I can see some of the things i did but how do you know the difference?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I just left my church of 5 years served immensely and I have never done this before I can see some of the things i did but how do you know the difference?</p>
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		<title>By: TJ</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-23970</link>
		<dc:creator>TJ</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 09 Dec 2007 01:26:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-23970</guid>
		<description>I know your post had nothing to do with church governmental structure, but I gotta give you a hi-five on the well-balanced democracy isn&#039;t always the best thing for the church talk.  

I can&#039;t think off the top of my head in Scripture where God ordained a &quot;people rule&quot; governmental structure.  God has an ordained leadership structure that we see throughout the New Testament.  He placed Pastors over the local church with apostles overseeing them.  Inside the church the pastors were overseeing the elders or bishops.   The only voting we see was where they were told to choose from among them what would be described as a deacon, which one was Steven.  That was a servant who helped with the widows and waited on people (a stark contrast of the senatorial representative of the congregation to the pastor the modern American church has perverted that position to become). And yes, I believe that it is the deacon&#039;s job to take care of the widows and orphans, visit the sick, etc as an extention of their pastor.  It&#039;s NOT their job to make sure the pastor is doing those things.

We now have churches that are plagued a democratic process where people are making carnally-minded decisions on spiritual things that are not theirs to make.  God does not ordain popular vote or petitions.  He ordains a leader.  We find now days that God is moving powerfully in the Apostollic model of leadership (not referring to the Apostollic denomination), and we&#039;re seeing more of the democratic-governed churches shrivelling up with little power to change the world around them.

A recommended read on this is Churchquake by Peter Wagner.  INCREDIBLE study on this topic!

&lt;em&gt;TJ&#039;s last blog post..&lt;/em&gt;&lt;a href=&#039;http://tjscott.wordpress.com/2007/12/05/145/&#039; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Three party politics&lt;/a&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I know your post had nothing to do with church governmental structure, but I gotta give you a hi-five on the well-balanced democracy isn&#8217;t always the best thing for the church talk.  </p>
<p>I can&#8217;t think off the top of my head in Scripture where God ordained a &#8220;people rule&#8221; governmental structure.  God has an ordained leadership structure that we see throughout the New Testament.  He placed Pastors over the local church with apostles overseeing them.  Inside the church the pastors were overseeing the elders or bishops.   The only voting we see was where they were told to choose from among them what would be described as a deacon, which one was Steven.  That was a servant who helped with the widows and waited on people (a stark contrast of the senatorial representative of the congregation to the pastor the modern American church has perverted that position to become). And yes, I believe that it is the deacon&#8217;s job to take care of the widows and orphans, visit the sick, etc as an extention of their pastor.  It&#8217;s NOT their job to make sure the pastor is doing those things.</p>
<p>We now have churches that are plagued a democratic process where people are making carnally-minded decisions on spiritual things that are not theirs to make.  God does not ordain popular vote or petitions.  He ordains a leader.  We find now days that God is moving powerfully in the Apostollic model of leadership (not referring to the Apostollic denomination), and we&#8217;re seeing more of the democratic-governed churches shrivelling up with little power to change the world around them.</p>
<p>A recommended read on this is Churchquake by Peter Wagner.  INCREDIBLE study on this topic!</p>
<p><em>TJ&#8217;s last blog post..</em><a href='http://tjscott.wordpress.com/2007/12/05/145/' rel="nofollow">Three party politics</a></p>
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		<title>By: Jeff</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-23731</link>
		<dc:creator>Jeff</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Dec 2007 02:31:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-23731</guid>
		<description>Rosjuane,
You are dead-on. It&#039;s true that in many churches (and even other organizations), people get comfortable with who they&#039;ve known for a long time and neglect to realize that the call of our Savior is to love all people, everywhere, not just those whose company they enjoy most.

The love of Christ beckons us all to get out of our comfort zones and to go beyond our social circles. 

As far as the democracy deal... I understand where you&#039;re coming from and why you&#039;re saying that. However, surely you don&#039;t want the church of Christ to resemble America? Do you want the same kind of society present in the church that we see in our country? 

Democracy is a precious thing, but the nation of Israel in the Old Testament was not set up as a democracy. Rather, God allowed them to have an aristocracy and even blessed it.

In the New Testament, we see a team of Sprit-gifted leaders who had authority over all the churches. Paul and Peter and the others calimed their authority as an apostle as they guided the churches in theology and practice.

God ordained leaders for the church to lead them and direct them. Ephesians 4.11-13 says, &quot;It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God&#039;s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.&quot;

In Hebrews 13.17, the admonition for believers is to &quot;obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.&quot;

 I believe Scripture teaches that God called and gifted key men and women to lead his people and equip them for service and lead them to maturity in Christ. They are to do so as servant-leaders, not as those who would exercise a harsh, autocratic, &quot;your opinion doesn&#039;t count&quot; approach.

1 Peter 5.2-3 speaks to these God-called leaders and says, &quot;Be shepherds of God&#039;s flock that is under your care, serving as overseersâ€”not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; &lt;i&gt;not lording it over those entrusted to you,&lt;/i&gt; but being examples to the flock.&quot;

How a church chooses to structure itself is simply a &lt;i&gt;means.&lt;/i&gt; There are a wide variety of church structures across our nation and globe. The important thing is that their structure serve to advance the cause of Christ. Democracy is a cherished institution for our country, and while everyone gets a voice, we&#039;ve also seen too often in politics, it&#039;s not always the wisest course of action.

I think equally important is for those who are joining or considering a church to understand in advance how the church is organized, what the vision and core values of the church are in advance. That way, they won&#039;t be frustrated later when they realize that the church isn&#039;t what they&#039;re &quot;used to.&quot;

Thanks for your comment!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rosjuane,<br />
You are dead-on. It&#8217;s true that in many churches (and even other organizations), people get comfortable with who they&#8217;ve known for a long time and neglect to realize that the call of our Savior is to love all people, everywhere, not just those whose company they enjoy most.</p>
<p>The love of Christ beckons us all to get out of our comfort zones and to go beyond our social circles. </p>
<p>As far as the democracy deal&#8230; I understand where you&#8217;re coming from and why you&#8217;re saying that. However, surely you don&#8217;t want the church of Christ to resemble America? Do you want the same kind of society present in the church that we see in our country? </p>
<p>Democracy is a precious thing, but the nation of Israel in the Old Testament was not set up as a democracy. Rather, God allowed them to have an aristocracy and even blessed it.</p>
<p>In the New Testament, we see a team of Sprit-gifted leaders who had authority over all the churches. Paul and Peter and the others calimed their authority as an apostle as they guided the churches in theology and practice.</p>
<p>God ordained leaders for the church to lead them and direct them. Ephesians 4.11-13 says, &#8220;It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God&#8217;s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.&#8221;</p>
<p>In Hebrews 13.17, the admonition for believers is to &#8220;obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.&#8221;</p>
<p> I believe Scripture teaches that God called and gifted key men and women to lead his people and equip them for service and lead them to maturity in Christ. They are to do so as servant-leaders, not as those who would exercise a harsh, autocratic, &#8220;your opinion doesn&#8217;t count&#8221; approach.</p>
<p>1 Peter 5.2-3 speaks to these God-called leaders and says, &#8220;Be shepherds of God&#8217;s flock that is under your care, serving as overseersâ€”not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; <i>not lording it over those entrusted to you,</i> but being examples to the flock.&#8221;</p>
<p>How a church chooses to structure itself is simply a <i>means.</i> There are a wide variety of church structures across our nation and globe. The important thing is that their structure serve to advance the cause of Christ. Democracy is a cherished institution for our country, and while everyone gets a voice, we&#8217;ve also seen too often in politics, it&#8217;s not always the wisest course of action.</p>
<p>I think equally important is for those who are joining or considering a church to understand in advance how the church is organized, what the vision and core values of the church are in advance. That way, they won&#8217;t be frustrated later when they realize that the church isn&#8217;t what they&#8217;re &#8220;used to.&#8221;</p>
<p>Thanks for your comment!</p>
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		<title>By: Rosjuane</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-23722</link>
		<dc:creator>Rosjuane</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Dec 2007 01:10:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-23722</guid>
		<description>&quot;Increase in â€œclan-nishnessâ€ - This happens when folks begin to associate only with a select few people within your church. Itâ€™s an unhealthy indication that they are not willing to plug in to otherâ€™s lives, only those who make them comfortable.&quot;

&quot;Undermining leadership or church vision - Rather than being supportive and helpful, they seem to want church done on their terms and in their prescribed way. They are unwilling to invest wholeheartedly in the vision of the collected leadership of the church and instead find ways through conversation, attendance and giving (or lack of it) to express their dissatisfaction&quot;
&quot;Rest assured, if a person doesnâ€™t ask you questions about you, they are most likely consumed with themselves.&quot; 

I feel like sometimes these go together.  It seems that sometimes it&#039;s the leaders or long time members that band together in a &quot;clan&quot; and then aren&#039;t willing to take others opinions into consideration.  Sometimes these people join together and are set in their ways and simply don&#039;t want to &quot;change&quot;.  They are set in their ways and won&#039;t take into consideration that some of the newer members have some suggestions to make things more accomidating for everyone.  They dictate everything and to me that is not how a church should run.  Church is about the whole body not just the elder members.  We live in America that is suppose to be a democracy so why wouldn&#039;t you have a church that was a democracy?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8220;Increase in â€œclan-nishnessâ€ &#8211; This happens when folks begin to associate only with a select few people within your church. Itâ€™s an unhealthy indication that they are not willing to plug in to otherâ€™s lives, only those who make them comfortable.&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;Undermining leadership or church vision &#8211; Rather than being supportive and helpful, they seem to want church done on their terms and in their prescribed way. They are unwilling to invest wholeheartedly in the vision of the collected leadership of the church and instead find ways through conversation, attendance and giving (or lack of it) to express their dissatisfaction&#8221;<br />
&#8220;Rest assured, if a person doesnâ€™t ask you questions about you, they are most likely consumed with themselves.&#8221; </p>
<p>I feel like sometimes these go together.  It seems that sometimes it&#8217;s the leaders or long time members that band together in a &#8220;clan&#8221; and then aren&#8217;t willing to take others opinions into consideration.  Sometimes these people join together and are set in their ways and simply don&#8217;t want to &#8220;change&#8221;.  They are set in their ways and won&#8217;t take into consideration that some of the newer members have some suggestions to make things more accomidating for everyone.  They dictate everything and to me that is not how a church should run.  Church is about the whole body not just the elder members.  We live in America that is suppose to be a democracy so why wouldn&#8217;t you have a church that was a democracy?</p>
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		<title>By: Mandy</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-23570</link>
		<dc:creator>Mandy</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 06 Dec 2007 02:59:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-23570</guid>
		<description>Very good post! Hits close to home and validates that we did leave our church for the &quot;right&quot; reasons. To me, when you go, give your all, and still just do not grow at a church, it&#039;s time to scoot on out. lol Amazing how I&#039;ve accomplished more spiritual growth at Journey in a matter of weeks than I could at our other church in 3yrs time... when God knows where he wants you, he knows where he wants you!

&lt;em&gt;Mandy&#039;s last blog post..&lt;/em&gt;&lt;a href=&#039;http://peaceandcraziness.blogspot.com/2007/12/so-grown-up.html&#039; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;So grown up&lt;/a&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Very good post! Hits close to home and validates that we did leave our church for the &#8220;right&#8221; reasons. To me, when you go, give your all, and still just do not grow at a church, it&#8217;s time to scoot on out. lol Amazing how I&#8217;ve accomplished more spiritual growth at Journey in a matter of weeks than I could at our other church in 3yrs time&#8230; when God knows where he wants you, he knows where he wants you!</p>
<p><em>Mandy&#8217;s last blog post..</em><a href='http://peaceandcraziness.blogspot.com/2007/12/so-grown-up.html' rel="nofollow">So grown up</a></p>
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		<title>By: Lou Arnold</title>
		<link>http://www.journeyguy.com/signs-that-someone-is-leaving-your-church/comment-page-1/#comment-23369</link>
		<dc:creator>Lou Arnold</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 04 Dec 2007 12:25:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.journeyguy.com/archives/1285#comment-23369</guid>
		<description>Great post.  It makes you think even if you are one of those that is there every time the doors are open.  Thanks for the insight.

&lt;em&gt;Lou Arnold&#039;s last blog post..&lt;/em&gt;&lt;a href=&#039;http://teacherarnold.com/blog/thankful-tuesday-4/&#039; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Thankful Tuesday&lt;/a&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Great post.  It makes you think even if you are one of those that is there every time the doors are open.  Thanks for the insight.</p>
<p><em>Lou Arnold&#8217;s last blog post..</em><a href='http://teacherarnold.com/blog/thankful-tuesday-4/' rel="nofollow">Thankful Tuesday</a></p>
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